Update on the Glands

Follow-up post to: Swollen Glands and a CT Scan

I saw the ENT today as a follow-up to my CT scan two Fridays ago. He hasn't seen the scan but read the review from the radiologist, which said that I do have swollen glands and lymph nodes on the right side and they are more pronounced than the left. Amazing. {Yes that is sarcasm. This is information I already had just by looking at myself or feeling my neck.} The radiologist also suggested that no reason for the reaction could be seen from the scan. This is only partially good news for me. I am grateful that nothing horrible was found but I feel frustrated that I still don't have answers.

The ENT gave me a script for antibiotics and asked me to go to my GP to run some blood tests to screen me for any autoimmune disorders. He felt that if I do not have an infection, an autoimmune disorder could be a possible reason for all the swelling. He also asked me to request a copy of my scan and to bring it with me, as well as the test results for the bloodwork, on my second follow-up appointment scheduled for next month.

I am angry that the doctor recommended a CT scan with all the expense and worry that follows. And now I'm mad that he made me pay another $50 for something that he could have easily done with a phone call. I don't appreciate him at this point. He was little help with Scott's questions. He offered no hope and made it sound like this is just how I am, lumpy and swollen.

Is This Only Funny to ME?

Kate is in the tub and she isn't doing what I tell her, nothing new. I am asking her to wash her hair. I go in the kitchen and do a few things and come back and her hair is still dry. I laugh and tell her to wash it. She says a few things and I feel a little annoyed so I tell her I am ignoring her. But then she says something and I respond. She says that I am not doing a good job of ignoring her. I remember and I laugh and say that she is right. I start getting ready for church in the bathroom and she says a few things and I ignore her and she says, "NOW you are ignoring me," as if to praise me. I laugh. She says, "Laughter is a response." I laugh some more. Clearly ignoring is not my strong point.

Now Kate is in the tub hollering out, "Are you typing what I said?"

Laughing Now and Later

I'm laughing inside as I think about what Scott did last night!

He came home from work around dinner time and got the keys for our truck and told me he was going to fill it up with fuel and run it through the automated wash at the gas station. I was just getting dinner going and trying to help Kate with homework and I really didn't want him to go. I knew we had some fuel and I knew he could wait until Saturday or even later. So, I whined and begged him not to go out but to stay with us and have dinner. He said the car wash closes early and he doesn't always get home in time to get it done. I begged again. He said he would be right back. Meanwhile I got dinner ready and read off Kate's spelling words. I was frustrated that he wasn't there and really missed him after a long day without him.

Dinner was minutes from being ready and I received a call from Scott. He told me he should have listened to me and not gone to get gas or wash the truck.

I thought, "Oh, no! Did he get in a wreck?"

He said, "I just did the most boneheaded thing ever!"

I braced myself...This was sounding expensive.

"I just put unleaded gas in BOTH tanks of our diesel truck," Scott said, humiliated.

After a gasp from me, Scott told me that he already spoke to our repair guy and he told Scott to have the truck towed to his shop.

NOTE: If you start a diesel engine with unleaded instead of diesel it can completely blow the engine and require costly repairs. Luckily Scott caught his mistake before starting up the truck. But the gas would still need to be purged carefully. He already arranged for his brother to come pick him up and tow him to the auto shop. He was delayed at least an extra half hour.

I was miffed just because I almost never beg him to stay. I try to be supportive of him. He even acknowledged how nice it is that I rarely beg him to stay when he needs to leave.

I was also upset because just the day before, he was complaining about how much money I am costing the family with my $700+ CT scan that the doctor recommended and several $50 co-pays to a specialist. He made me feel really rotten about that. I know that he was just feeling the weight of expenses and being the sole-provider but it still hurt that he was even complaining about the costs of my health.

I was also frustrated because I had plans. I was really hoping to take the truck that night to do a Zumba class with a friend. And I wanted to drive Kate to school in the morning because it's so cold. Plus, I had plans to use the truck after dropping Kate off at school. I was thinking this was really an inconvenience that could have been avoided.

But I was grateful that he is so responsible and helpful. He always gasses up the truck and washes it and even though he rarely drives it, because he most always drives his work van, I still never have to worry how much gas I have or if the truck needs service or anything.

I also felt grateful that I don't have to work and that we live so close to things that I could walk if I had to.

It is really funny, actually. I know Scott will never live this down. In fact, while I was on the phone with Scott, his little brother, Todd, pulled up to tow him to the shop and I could hear him laughing at Scott. That was priceless.

So, I was miffed. But before Scott came home, Kate and I decided to forgive him and be nice to him when he finally returned. 

I love that Scott was so humble about his mistake. I love that he immediately told me that he should've listened to me. I love that he called himself a bonehead. I love that he laughed at it and apologized for being so tight about money the day before. I love that he allowed the leveling that fate or God gave him to take effect and change him just a little. Because he was such a good sport about all this, I felt much better. This will be a fun memory for both of us and I know he will put this in his list of most embarrassing moments.

Julie's Thousand Island

I made Thousand Island dressing yesterday! Scott has one particular Thousand that he loves called Marie's. I can only buy it at Target. After messing around with my bottled Poppy seed dressing adding equal parts vinegar and lemon juice to give it more of a zing and stretch it out a bunch, I got thinking about Scott's Thousand. I mean it's basically ketchup, mayo, and sweet pickle relish. So I mixed those ingredients together. But would Scott like it?

I put his Marie's dressing in a dish and my concoction in another dish for a side-by-side comparison. I had a bowl of lettuce for taste testing. I was excited. I do this kind of stuff to Scott all the time and usually wind up disappointed because he has such discriminating taste. He takes one look or lick of whatever experiment I put before him and shakes his head. BUT this time, HE LOVED IT! He had it on his salad and it passed the test! Amazing!

Swollen Glands and a CT Scan

A couple of my glands have been swollen for most of 2012. Then in November, I noticed several of the nodes in my neck swelling and staying that way. After fretting over it for several months, I finally decided to call and schedule an appointment with an ENT. With a month to wait before the appointment, I started second-guessing myself. "Do I really need to see a specialist?" I thought about the $50 copay and felt even more stupid for calling in a specialist. I worried he would just laugh at me and tell me it was no big deal, take my money, and send me out the door.

Despite my fears of being ridiculed, to the ENT I went today. To my surprise, he seemed concerned. When he started examining my neck and feeling all the swollen glands and nodes he said, "Yes, they are rather large." And then he had his assistant schedule a CT scan for this Friday.

He said once he looks at the scan, he will know whether he will then go forward with a biopsy.
Weird stuff, right?

It's Out. Isn't It?

Blogging is out of vogue and it makes me sad. I feel a little stuck. I have so much I would love to say but I feel like, "What's the point?" Then sometimes I think I will just blog on, even though my circle of blog friends have quit. So I think about what I would blog about and it is all rather blue or gray. I don't want to be blue and gray. That's just lame. So then I do nothing. But doing nothing puts me in a different kind of fog. A "I have stuff to say that I'm not saying - fog." So here I am. Stuck. Trapped.

And maybe that is all I will say today.

And maybe that is all I will say again ever.

And maybe it really doesn't matter.

Random

I voted early. Loved that. I am excited to see how the election shakes out. I am really into it this year, watching the updates at night with Scott and talking politics with strangers. Fun stuff.

Kate received a Halloween Search and Find book from a neighbor and everyday we do a new one together at breakfast. Super-fun for us to enjoy that time together. Whatever we can do to slow down a little and carve out joy.

It's a beautiful day outside today. Kate has the day off school so we've really enjoyed just chilling. We went for a walk and talked about cool stuff like all the many colors of leaves.

We refinanced our house - 3.5% - Wahoo! We are going on vacation in December with the money we are saving this month without a house payment and the refund check we get from the escrow account. Scott lives for vacations. I am getting excited about it also. I'm especially glad that he wants to spend our money investing in our family. We are just a little family so we can up and go and do this kind of stuff without as much expense as bigger families. We really have to take advantage of this and enjoy every moment we have together.

I am enjoying reading the House of Earth by Pearl S. Buck. I highly recommend it. The book is a trilogy with The Good Earth, Sons of Wang, and A House Divided. Pick it up and enjoy it with me! Best read ever!

And that is my randomness for today. I also want to say that I love the time change. I always tell myself that I will get extra sleep with the extra hour and I never do but this year, I really did. And it was awesome.